December didn't start off so well. My dad passed away the 6th of this month, quite suddenly. Well, sorta. He was diagnosed with single cell carcinoma of the lung (lung cancer) 2 years ago this past November. They gave him a year to live. 2 years later, and he was doing ok. We'd noticed a general decline in the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving, he was sleeping more, taking more pain pills, etc. The Friday after Thanksgiving, my brother called my mother and told her she needed to get home and get Daddy to the emergency room, as something wasn't quite right. He declined rapidly and only lasted a little over a week.
Life is different without my daddy. I think of half a dozen things I need to ask him every day. From advice on bb guns, to car advice, to general chit chat I always enjoyed with him. I was too numb, too shocked when it first happened, but reality has begun to set in. My daddy is gone, and I feel a bit more colder in the world.
On top of this was the usual stress about Christmas. On a site I frequent (wwww.unsolvedmysteries.com, I'm author ID 63201), I'd posted about how my kids were going to have a bare Christmas, but we'd pull through, somehow. I really didn't post expecting anyone to respond with offers of gifts, but boy oh boy did my USM family come through! Long story short, my boys had the BEST Christmas they've ever had. We still haven't made it through all the toys they've receieved. It was most definitely a Christmas miracle.
Saturday, the 27th, was the 3rd anniversary of my husband's death. I didn't shed a tear. The pain is still there, but it's just a dull throb now. I never thought the day would come where I could think about him without crying, but it has. I'm still angry at him for a lot of unsolved things, but I know I can do nothing about it.
I had a rather interesting morning today. I can't go into too many details, as the person this is about, has a blog and I think reads mine too. However, I will say that her and her family were on my heart and mind this morning when I woke up. I don't know why, in particular, I wasn't dreaming about them, and hadn't been thinking of them when I went to bed. So I stumbled out of bed and headed for my computer for my morning smoke.
I kid you not, as clear as day I heard a voice tell me to move on what was in my heart. I do believe it was the voice of God. I've heard God speak in my heart before, but never with such force and clarity like He did today. I literally heard the words in my ears. I even looked around to make sure no one had come into my house and was speaking. I moved on what He told me to move on, and so far it has come to fruition. I take no personal claim in this, this was solely God's work. He has a purpose for everything, amazing grace!
I am a bit nervous, though. I applied for a work-at-home job, legitimate companies. One is more strict than the other about background and credit checks. So I'm going with the one that's a little less strict. I have a phone interview scheduled with the Human Resources department for Wednesday. If I get this job, I will have to travel an hour each way every day for 6 weeks before I can work from home (that's the training period.) Perfect attendance is required to be able to be hired. I pray for the gas money needed to get me back and forth (if I'm hired), it's only for 6 weeks and then I get to stay at home. Please pray for me, I need all the help I can get!
So that's December in a nutshell. One heck of a rollercoaster ride. May 2009 hold much brighter hope and light than 2008!
Life is different without my daddy. I think of half a dozen things I need to ask him every day. From advice on bb guns, to car advice, to general chit chat I always enjoyed with him. I was too numb, too shocked when it first happened, but reality has begun to set in. My daddy is gone, and I feel a bit more colder in the world.
On top of this was the usual stress about Christmas. On a site I frequent (wwww.unsolvedmysteries.com, I'm author ID 63201), I'd posted about how my kids were going to have a bare Christmas, but we'd pull through, somehow. I really didn't post expecting anyone to respond with offers of gifts, but boy oh boy did my USM family come through! Long story short, my boys had the BEST Christmas they've ever had. We still haven't made it through all the toys they've receieved. It was most definitely a Christmas miracle.
Saturday, the 27th, was the 3rd anniversary of my husband's death. I didn't shed a tear. The pain is still there, but it's just a dull throb now. I never thought the day would come where I could think about him without crying, but it has. I'm still angry at him for a lot of unsolved things, but I know I can do nothing about it.
I had a rather interesting morning today. I can't go into too many details, as the person this is about, has a blog and I think reads mine too. However, I will say that her and her family were on my heart and mind this morning when I woke up. I don't know why, in particular, I wasn't dreaming about them, and hadn't been thinking of them when I went to bed. So I stumbled out of bed and headed for my computer for my morning smoke.
I kid you not, as clear as day I heard a voice tell me to move on what was in my heart. I do believe it was the voice of God. I've heard God speak in my heart before, but never with such force and clarity like He did today. I literally heard the words in my ears. I even looked around to make sure no one had come into my house and was speaking. I moved on what He told me to move on, and so far it has come to fruition. I take no personal claim in this, this was solely God's work. He has a purpose for everything, amazing grace!
I am a bit nervous, though. I applied for a work-at-home job, legitimate companies. One is more strict than the other about background and credit checks. So I'm going with the one that's a little less strict. I have a phone interview scheduled with the Human Resources department for Wednesday. If I get this job, I will have to travel an hour each way every day for 6 weeks before I can work from home (that's the training period.) Perfect attendance is required to be able to be hired. I pray for the gas money needed to get me back and forth (if I'm hired), it's only for 6 weeks and then I get to stay at home. Please pray for me, I need all the help I can get!
So that's December in a nutshell. One heck of a rollercoaster ride. May 2009 hold much brighter hope and light than 2008!
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